Atheist Parenting

Indestructible

This topic contains 1 reply, has 2 voices, and was last updated by  Strega 2 weeks ago.

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  • #5985

    Belle Rose
    Participant

    A lot of talk and a whole lot of nothing

    They think they have all the answers, and can teach you something

    Picking up half truths one line at a time

    Trying to piece it all together while you’re laying awake crying

    “You know yourself best and that of your son”..,

    “No I don’t, that’s why I need you to tell me

    Or I could just flip a coin and pick one…

    Cuz I don’t know how to make my own decisions

    I’ve been beaten to the ground, spent my whole life in submission

    I’m just barely starting to wake up
    And feel the possibility of freedom

    But I can’t get the past out of my head, and I’m clawing away screaming!

    “Someone please help me! I can’t do this alone!”

    “Give it all to Jesus, he died for you you know,”

    That answer tells me you really don’t care.

    You just want to feel like you did something to help

    You get to move on and live your life in happiness

    But I’m still stuck here screaming drowning in my own sadness

    Looking for answers and becoming more confused

    Slowly dying inside as I’m battered and bruised

    Having to face him, he never stops blaming me

    Makes me feel like I’m worthless, purposefully trying to hurt me

    It never ends, it never stops

    Circling around with deadly thoughts

    Wanting to feel like I’m slowly healing

    Seeing my son smile, is enough to keep fighting

    It took us almost dying to get what we needed

    Not Allah or Jesus, or a class about breathing

    Not some phony guess work diagnosis

    Or a few insincere attempts to placate our emotions

    Fuck Jesus, Fuck Allah, Fuck the mental health system,

    For all the excuses, and bullshit so-called workers in the profession

    Fuck everyone who thinks they can try to tell me…What I should do differently to change my parenting

    They would die too if it was up to them

    I’m tired…tired of the cop outs and bullshit excuses

    Tired of everything being so complicated, and no one giving two shits

    Fuck everyone, they failed me. And proved to be empty

    Now I know all I really have is me.

    It’s up to me

    I am indestructible

    #6012

    Strega
    Moderator

    Great piece of writing, Belle

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