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This topic contains 2 replies, has 2 voices, and was last updated by  mike 1 month ago.

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  • #28901

    mike
    Participant

    Hey there Homo,

    Its me: the alien from another galaxy. The only thing is; I’m not an alien, and I’m not from another galaxy. The interesting thing is that you already have all the science to know that, but just never came to the sensible conclusion. That’s right: your Physicists were “bang-on” with their “Laws of Thermodynamics”. Its true; nothing can go faster than the speed of light. And guess what? Worm-holes are fiction! So, it is surprising that you think my kind came from some distant galaxy. We don’t even visit Proxima Centauri much because who wants to float around an empty void for four-freakin-years anyway. Can you imagine sitting in a box for 25,000 years if you wanted to visit this galaxy from the nearest one. That’s just… well, its stupid.

    And we get everything we need from hanging here in this solar system. We do get quite close to the speed-of-light in our flying machines. They are not really “flying” machines. We call them gravitational-nullification-devices (GNDs) Just a quick 8.5-minute jump and we can visit our life-giving sun. By the way, Jupiter: less than an hour in GND time, is a mighty fine place to visit any epoch of year, and taking a methane swim on Titan: there is just nothing comparable here on earth… But I digress…let me dispel the rumours and set you straight on who we are, and what advanced species you are really interacting with, on this lovely-little-dirtball you call earth.

    Let us go back a few years: 200,000 approximately. That is when Homo erectus, your race and my race shared a common ancestor. I bet you thought Homo sapiens was the “cats ass” here on earth, the pinnacle of complexity, the most evolved organism? Guess what? You’re wrong. Since your so fond of taxonomy lets just call my tribe, currently… Homo atlantianupyouranusis. We are distant cousins of Homo sapiens and earth is our home planet too…You bet we shared this planet then, and now…when we choose to be here…. which is more-often-than-not. Some of you have seen us in the night sky; your jet-fighter pilots have filmed us; your astronauts have interacted; and sometimes we even invite one or two of you up for a proctology examination. I must apologize for the latter…please just ask one of your biologist why… you really can learn reams of information by examining other species butt-holes.

    You can also learn a lot from archeology…or you could if you didn’t have tiny brains. As your government is aware, but for some unfathomable reason is scared to tell you…the spaceships they found; that they are still studying 50 years later; and blowing themselves up with; trying unsuccessfully to decipher simple technology; they are our older GNDs. They didn’t come from space though. We built them right here…made in China to be exact. We left them as junk, several thousand years ago, in various places around the globe and your archeologist found them in their dig sites. Not from another planet; but you would know that…if you didn’t have tiny brains.

    Many years ago, we all looked very similar. We all had tiny brains, ours were just a little bigger. All of us came from the same single celled organism that came into existence, several-billions-of-years-ago. We are close-cousins, along with every other organism on earth, who are distant-cousins: you, me and our immediate cousins the Neanderthals, the Denisovans and Flores man, to name a few (cute little things those hobbits). Too bad Homo sapiens wiped them off the face of the earth; along with every Neanderthal and Denisovan; apart from a few of their woman, who became sex-slaves. But then I think you guessed that already… you found remnants of their genes within your sequences. So, after raping all their woman and killing all their men you finally advanced enough to discover the little Neanderthal, a smidgeon of Denisovan, in your genetic blueprint. You thought H. sapiens was all the sentience that remained to rule Terra: exploiting willy-nilly to your hearts content. Incorrect: because we split off from you (correctly identifying you as a little deviant; apparently) and went on our own evolutionary journey.

    The thing is that, as we developed complex technologies over the next 150,000 years, you and your bros developed superstitions and religion. While we perfected gravitational-energy-technology you perfected technologies designed for killing your fellow Homos…as-well-as any organism that didn’t look like you; or any organism you thought might taste good in the cook pot; or any organism that breathed. Way to invent fire by-the-way…made those hobbits so much more palatable. Of course, as your ancestors were chipping away at flint rocks and cracking mammoth bones, for that delicious marrow; by 30,000 years ago our new and improved Homo a-pluses had already dispensed with digestive systems and were just putting the finishing touches on our genetically enhanced cognitive capabilities…i.e.: IQ 1000, thankyou-very-much. But that’s ok…you had Zeus and Odin and burning witches to occupy your mini-minds. And to this day, you refuse to advance your species genetically for fear if insulting fictitious entities.

    So where was Homo atlantianupyouranusis while Homo sapiens struggled with complex decisions, like what neighbouring tribe to rape and pillage or what Gods to be subservient too. Well, I can certainly tell you where we were not. We were not hiding. We are not hiding from you…surprising as it is to believe, and… I do not mean to be cruel…you just do not merit our consideration…

    We helped your species right up until the time we advanced so far beyond anything your capable of imagining that you became like… annoying. Sorry, but you are such silly-little-busy creatures to us: most of us think of you as…actually; we rarely think of you anymore; similar-to, the way you rarely think of an ant, unless you want to perform some nasty, extermination experiment or simply step on it deliberately. Can you even appreciate the trouble it took, to drag myself down to your level of communication: to convey my message? You have no idea …imagining trying to communicate with a slug; that might allow you to sympathize with my plight. Like if you noticed a flea on a dog’s back, would you try to explain to it the discomfort it is causing the animal…no….you would either pick the flea off, or tolerate the imposition knowing “all dogs have fleas” … it is just the nature of the universe. Let the dog scratch until the flea realizes it is no longer welcome and then it may choose to hop off. Hint: you may want to eventually direct some of your attention away from clever methods of killing each other to…methods of absconding.

    Why do we not rid the world of the menace you are? Although we love earth, we no longer require the earth to survive. My kind makes the entire solar-system its home and everything we need to exist comes mostly from other planets and the occasional ice-ball that intersects our trajectories. We have simply left earth to deal with its other evolved organisms as it sees fit. The earth does not need our protection…it is perfectly capable of scratching off its own fleas if the whim arises…it has a limited lifespan of a few billion more years before the sun burns it up, so what is the use worrying about your activities… Whether or not you terrestrials choose to stay around for the fireworks or annihilate yourselves tomorrow, and every unfortunate organism that has the unpleasant misfortune to share planet earth with you, does not even register as part of our equation.

    And no, presently we do not want to talk to you anymore. Why you ask? It is simply because we have long-ago dispensed with the material concerns of our biological existence; including all the organism we, at one time, exploited too. We may, if we choose, sometime probe your butts; but generally, we no longer require you for our uplift to a Galactic Society. You might say we have evolved into our own headspace now.

    We prefer to contemplate universal consciousness instead of universal ruination. “Ignore all” is our philosophy; so… Homo whatever is on their own. “Love all”, not “fear all” is our motto. Recently we became aware some of you are coming around to that maxim: ever so slowly.

    We have always tried to stay far away from Homo destructoralis, I mean Homo sapiens, but as I said; at times we tried to help you too…we built some pyramids all over the world (sorry to dispel the rumour…you thought your species capable of such a feat as lifting 120 tonne rocks and placing them precisely, let alone setting up the million two-tonne-rocks it took to build the big one: into a complex celestially aligned informational device).

    We left clues to our existence, like that big one, and in other sculptures also… but you are so clueless, and you wasted all your time, endlessly bickering on how it was built, to ever figure out why it was built. FYI…the lion was mine…a replica sculpture of my favourite pet…and you had the nerve to re-carve its face. But that was forgiven, three-thousand-years-ago and BTW… look under the left front paw…informational treasure trove, wink, wink!!!

    Let me pause here to give you an idea of some of the mega-disasters that came so close to wiping your inane species from this planet.

    I will go back just 50,000 years ago. That’s when Homo sapiens was right-smack in the middle of the last ice-age, and all that remained of your kind: about five-thousand miserable humans huddled together in South African caves along the coast-line. Most of earths water was incorporated in huge ice-sheets covering the continents, so the ocean’s coast-line was about four-hundred feet lower than today. Regardless, you were miserable and struggling. We however, already looked totally different, physically, and luckily enough we were already a separate species, totally incapable of interbreeding with your kind.

    Occasionally we would show up and drop a life-line, but that could have been a mistake; since being the primitives you are; you misinterpreted us as being Gods and developed complex stories to explain our existence. We still laugh over that (but not with long-abandoned mouth-parts). As an aside, we really can’t understand why you couldn’t figure out that we were not Gods, even after your European descendants landed in America (for the second time) and saw how easy it was to dupe the locals. Too bad their religious superiority, their lust for golden bobbles and your stinky, bacteria-infested bodies destroyed those civilizations you first met in America… because they did have records of our existence and ways to communicate with us before you destroyed everything in faith-filled zeal. They showed proper respect by passing down oral traditions of historical significance but also, being Homo sapiens as well, made the error: thinking of us as Gods.

    And we certainly did not feel God-like between 12,000 and 13,000 years ago. That’s when Homo sapiens and us; Homo d-minus-with-a->1000-intelligence-coefficient almost met our extinction event. At the time of The Younger Dryas meteor impact our gravitational-technology was just in it’s infancy. No GNDs had yet been developed with this technology. We were still bound to our earthly existence: not yet conquerors of the solar system. Observing the impact trajectory of the Taurid meteors; which was going to be a monstrous impact event like the one that almost took our ancestors out, 65-million-years-ago; we calculated an impact force necessary to deflect the kilometer-size metallic asteroid. Unfortunately, we used a ballistic-force sufficient to break the meteorite into smaller fragments therefore, not deflecting it, but sending it crashing down in several smaller pieces. The result was impactors strewn across both the Laurentide, Cordilleran ice-sheets…the result was half of North America and about 30% of the earth-land-mass suffering directly. A thousand-foot wall of glacial melt-water raised the oceans and giga-tonnes of mud and water instantly evaporated, blotting out the sun for 1300 years. This caused a mega-fauna extinction and much of primitive Homo sapiens races, like the Clovis population, were obliterated instantly or slowly over those years; depending on how close to the impact epicentres. Oops!!! Needless-to-say… that set us back a bit. Fortunately, most of us lived on the other side of the earth at the time of impact.

    So, after several thousand years we recovered; built technologies and a few simple pyramidal-structures; that remain unfathomable to your simple brains. We, the masters of gravity, travel the solar system reaching velocities close to the speed of light and generally try to avoid any contact with terrestrial organisms. Its a fine life and we would never invite you to be part of it…because…your stupid.

    One day Homo sapiens will either rise above its supercilious attitude or disappear. That you are going to bring down the ecosystem that gave us life does not concern us, but it should concern you; because in your apes-with-pants state of being, you are totally dependent on this terrestrial abode.

    Love you,

    The Alien from this planet

    #28930

    Strega
    Moderator

    😂😂😂😂😂

    Excellent!

    #28931

    mike
    Participant

    Thx… Its my new/original theory; but placing it within a fictional tale (even though I believe it to be more plausible than any other alien theory I’ve heard)…I like this technique. It allows you to say just about anything without having to fact check and has just enough reality and truth to make you wonder…

    Mike

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