Bible "Proof" That God is a WOMAN

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  • #4837

    Dang Martin
    Participant

    This is a good example of what does NOT count as “proof.”

    Some of you might be old enough to remember a time when there were only a handful of television stations, and they actually signed off for the night. There would be a video of the American flag with the Star Spangled Banner playing, and then nothing but static.

    But before that, there would be a little program called something like A Moment of Inspiration. This was typically a short 5-minute piece, where a preacher sits at a desk on a set, and they give you a passage from the bible that should fill your heart or move you.

    I had fallen asleep, trying to watch a Frankenstein movie on this late night horror show, when I woke up in this for this Moment of Inspiration. It was a woman preacher, and she started off her message by saying something that caught my attention.

    “I have found proof in the bible that god is a woman.”

    WHAT? What the…… WHAT?

    I had read the bible by this point in my life, and I saw nothing that even provided proof of a god, let alone proof that this god was a woman. I WOKE up, sat up, and was paying very close attention to what she was about to say. Because if there really was proof that god was a WOMAN, then it would be painfully clear that EVERY PREACHER AND EVERY PERSON IN HISTORY, up to this point, got it COMPLETELY WRONG.

    How could SO MANY people be so wrong? After all, there is PROOF… IN THE BIBLE… that god IS A WOMAN!

    She then carefully opened her bible to the page where this proof could be found. At this time, I am going to share with you her “proof” that god is a woman. This is what she said:

    Luke 15:8-10
    The Story of the Lost Coin
    8-10 “Or imagine a woman who has ten coins and loses one. Won’t she light a lamp and scour the house, looking in every nook and cranny until she finds it? And when she finds it you can be sure she’ll call her friends and neighbors: ‘Celebrate with me! I found my lost coin!’ Count on it—that’s the kind of party God’s angels throw every time one lost soul turns to God.”

    The lights begin to fade, and a voice said, “This concludes your Moment of Inspiration.”

    I sat there. Staring. Mouth open. “This… it can’t…. that CAN’T be it?!?!!”

    There had to be more to the story. I opened the bible I was reading, and read a bit before the story, as well as a bit after, in case she had accidentally forgotten to include a detail, or maybe they cut her off too early.

    No.

    There was nothing about any of it that “proved” that god was a woman, or that a god even exists.

    This was roughly 40 years ago, and during these four decades, it has come up in my mind from time to time. When a Jehova’s Witness knocks on my door, sometimes I will actually let them in, fix some tea, and ask them to help me understand this claim, this proof, and what it means. The only comfort I find is their response that they, too, have no idea what that woman was talking about, and that this “proof” also makes no sense to them.

    Some have said that in order for me to see this “proof,” or to understand it, that I should not be asking them, or anybody else, what it means. Instead, I have to believe in my heart, and pray about it, and the “proof” will be delivered.

    Maybe my expectations are way too high, but I think that I should be able to read this passage, and then get what I need in order to be able to see this “proof.” When I read other books, they make sense.

    #5890

    Warren Smith
    Participant

    I suspect that she saw the strong parallel between the story of the lost coin and the lost sheep parable that immediately precedes it.  Since Christ is associated with the shepherd, it seems natural to suspect a connection between him and the woman.  I do think that there is a connection between the two parables and it is intended to suggest that something “feminine” is connected to God but it is not as simple as equating the woman with Christ.  There is something really deep here that cannot be explained in a few words, but I can leave you with a clue as to how deep this goes.

    In Plato’s Theaetetus Socrates is quoted as saying:

    “In the name of the Graces, what an almighty wise man Protagoras must have been! He spoke these things in a parable to the common herd, like you and me, but told the truth, his Truth, in secret to his own disciples.”

     

    #5891

    Matt
    Participant

    Makes sense to me… the passage is relating the experience of a woman finding a lost coin to the experience of God finding a lost soul. The tenuous part is the assumption that because of this, God must be a woman… as if men aren’t capable of celebration over a found coin or something.

     

    Overall, very poor “proof” of anything (as all other theistic proofs have been, in my experience).

    #5892

    Could it be that if no man can know the mind of God that God must be a woman because no man can understand the mind of a woman. At least that is what a few women have told me over the years.

    #5893

    Simon Paynton
    Participant

    You could say that “God’s love” = “wisdom” = “truth” + “compassion”, and these are, respectively, masculine and feminine domains, traditionally speaking.

    #5896

    Strega
    Moderator

    After this, let’s debate the color unicorns get when they’re old.

    #5897

    Davis
    Participant

    After this, let’s debate the color unicorns get when they’re old.

    +1

    #5898

    Ken Ham explains that Biblical Unicorns were real and even has a doctor on the case who says that accurate history never violates Biblical history. There is a picture of one but I am not sure how old it is. Fronkeys are yellow when they are born and turn bright green at 6 months when they hit puberty. Hmmm, I think we need a theologian to help us out.

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